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How to Embrace being Single When You Don't Want to Be

So, you're single.

Most of us have been there at least once before, where you want nothing more than to be in a committed relationship, but can't seem to get it. You hear people say that you'll find the "right relationship" at the right time, you just have to be patient. But that's easy for others to say when they're living the life that you want (aka...married!).

I spent a lot of my life single (like a lot, oops). And while there were definitely times when I wished for nothing else but a relationship, singleness also brought a lot of good. But no matter how you're feeling about your singleness, one thing is true...


Singleness may not be the ultimate destination you're after, but if you find yourself in this season, there is a way to embrace your current stage while also hoping for something in the future.

  1. Pour into community. Find yourself a group of friends in a similar life stage and start doing life with them. This could be a book club, a small group at church, or some friends from the local gym. Singleness won't feel so hard if you're going through it with others.

  2. Visualize goals for your current stage. Life doesn't have to feel like it's on a perpetual hold. Take time and create goals for your current stage of life, whether that be in career, friends, or hobbies. Make these goals unrelated to whether or not you have a partner. And dream big! Maybe you have some personal growth goals you'd like to accomplish.

  3. Get clear on what you really want. It can be easily to be whisked away in relationships or talking to others about their life goals. Take some time to really get familiar with what you're looking for in a partner, and what that person would be looking for in you. If you need help with this step, I've created a workbook to get you there. Find it here.

You Got This.

Samantha Hoover

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